Oh Owl. You look so pretty. But where is your Christmas scarf and why are you Carrying your star? I thought we agreed that you would Wear the star. You know. To be more Christmassy.
I don’t want to be a Christmas Owl, miss c. Do I look like a tree? I am not a tree. i am an important owl. I am in charge of Stuff. I have to guard things. If I take my eyes off the porch those peahens will be up there, being bad. Stealing. Messing about. It is not in my job description to be the Christmas Owl. That is in Trees description. But Where is Tree? Nowhere to be bloody found! Did a runner, didn’t he! Up sticks and took off. Left it all to me as usual.
Now, listen Owl. Honey. Be a good chap and put on the star. All the best Christmas trees have a star on top. Did you see where I put my camera?
But I am an owl, miss c.
I don’t quite see the problem, sweetie. Christmas Owls are all the rage. Here, hold still while I put my Christmas scarf on you. My daughter sent this all the way from Thailand you know.
Where? Where are they all the rage? You are choking me. I can’t move my head.
Oh God everywhere darling. Where are my gloves? Sheila has a Christmas Owl. And I know Daisy is saving up for one. But she can’t save much until she starts selling her milk again. So it may be a while. I am off out to do the chores, when I come back in I want that star in place, honey. You will look great, promise.
Watch the steps, miss c! You might fall and have some sense knocked into your wooly head.
I heard that!
Yesterday was one of those days when you would not envy the life of a farmer. Do you remember that episode of the Good Life when whatsername kept getting her boots stuck in the mud, I am sure there was a pig in that one as well. The dogs and I were surrounded in muck. And it was all soft and squelchy. Yes, poggy. Sucky. Everything was saturated. We were still just above freezing for most of the day, then it took a dive and the squelch had a thin layer of crunchy ice on top. This does not bode well.
‘Sometimes you win and sometimes you Learn’ so I have put up heating lights for the pigs above their pens where the big birds can safely perch close by, sharing the warmth. Very safely. I hate heat lamps they are very dangerous. But over the next few days it is going to get very cold again. Sheila’s lamp is red. She likes her red lamp. And was observed standing warming her bottom for quite some time in the early evening. If she were a matronly lady she would have raised the hem of her skirt just a little to let the hot air move up.
The chickens are still laying at half speed. They are muddy too. Now let’s check on our Christmas Owl.
See Owl? Don’t you feel festive? Tree like? With your beautiful star. That is part of an old lightening rod you know. It is an antique.
Ok, miss c, I put the star on. Can I go back outside now? Pole is waiting.
No Owl. You are a lovely Christmas Owl and you have to stay inside ’til after Christmas. It’s a Christmas rule.
After Christmas. Will I get trifle? Well, at least take me out of the window, other birds might see me. They will laugh.
Oh they are just jealous. Just wait until Christmas morning when you are surrounded in presents then everyone will want to be a Christmas Owl. So how about some tinsel, shall I find some tinsel? Do you think Our John has some tinsel in his box of Star Trek Christmas decorations? And what about some little Santa earrings I am sure The Matriarch will lend you hers. Maybe we could paint your toes in gold glitter nail polish, would that be christmassy? I have always been a wee bit foggy on what is Christmassy and what is not. Don’t sigh Owl. This is fun. Are you having fun yet?
I hope you have a lovely day.
your friend on the farmy,
celi
The Kitchen's Garden 
50 responses to “The Christmas Owl”
Being a lady of some advanced years I do exactly what Sheila does but I stand in front of fire and warm my rear end….
owl looks very pretty but I can ubderstand his predicament should other birds spy him all dressed up.
Does he like trifle….I love it made with fresh dairy cream which we cannot get in Bulgaria so I make do with Mascapone..tastes just as good.
Happy Christmas to miss C, mr John and every single animal
I too love poggy. and the decorated Owl. We are having bendy tree gales every other day this week. One of our neighbours has just cut down several pine tress from his front garden because they were too big and shady for the flowers. Only after he had lost several slates from the roof yesterday did he realise what a good windbreak they had been.
Wait!! I thought the word was puggy? I know I saw that somewhere…I think it was here yesterday! Yes, C. said it was gettting all puggy and filthy with the mud and all! 🙂
X-mas Owl….you are the coolest one I’ve seen….and I’ve seen lots of them! 🙂
Your Owl doesn’t look too happy with you, but he has no option, has he.?? Have a good Christmas and may next year be all you want it to be…
I love the Christmas Owl! And that old star thingie is just perfect, too. We have a red heat lamp in the hen house while it is so cold and the hens are all laying an egg a day. So cold this winter. We put wood ashes out for them so they could dust their feathers……great clouds of ashes as they make their bomb craters. You are so funny, Celi. A real treat to read your blog.
There is the slimmest possibility that you might be a goof.
ROFL – I hope Sheila still gets gets her blanket 😉
I think you should be ashamed of yourself, tormenting poor innocent owls like that! No wonder he looks disgruntled.
Owl Dear, you look absolutely divine! Resplendent and Wondiferous, like your Person who takes care of you.
What a jolly good post! I had to laugh at the look on Owl’s face…he really doesn’t like being the Christmas Owl. Thank you for the great time!!!
Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
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The expression of indignation on that owl’s face is hysterical! I love your ‘conversations’ with him, I love Sheila warming her bottom, and I love the farmy. Happy Christmas, dear Celi. I know it’s a day early, but you’ll be inundated with good wishes tomorrow, and after all, I am ahead of you all down here in Oztrylia. Where it’s hot. No pog to be seen…
Poor owl looks most discomfited even with that lovely scarf! He is not impressed with your shenanigans at all, at all. But maybe a hot toddy tonight might unruffle his feathers and remind him of the little pleasures of indoor life.
Poor little owl, he doesn’t look happy, but he really does make a fine tree substitute! He looks quite regal with the star on his head – I hope he doesn’t attract lightning. 🙂 Certainly not a day on the farm that I envy you for, hope tomorrow is a little easier, and everyone manages to stay warm.. xxx
Frighteningly cute. Happy Holidays to you!
Completely brilliant and I can hear Owl’s voice in my head….something between Fenella Fielding and Joanna Lumley I think 😉
Or is owl a “he”?!
well actually I had thought of him as a He. I was going to call him Roger!! c
maybe the voice of Noel Fielding then?