First … ditch the help! I had Blue and his Mouth who thought it was a great lark to play with the wires.
“You should have waited for the men” says The Big Dog.
“Sod that” says Author, back on form, minus a uterus and following me everywhere.
Hmm, say Miss C, it seems we have a wee bit of a tangle.
Oh dear” says Sheila, (I think! It is hard to tell who that is with all the mud) “A snarl is what that is.”
After some gentle untangling and frequent repostitioning of the puppy I did get the first roll unraveled and laid out. I checked the instructions again and it said “Do NOT get the fence tangled.” and later,” It is a fence best put up by two people.” Well there is only one people and a pig I thought, so I unwrapped the second roll with much more care, profiting from my experience and it came apart beautifully and went up without an problems. Not exactly quickly but practice makes perfect.
Once it was all stood up and attached to the solar charger then out came the somewhat bemused group of large animals. Now they have a proper, cattle fence to enable me to graze them a little more intensively down the fields.
When shifting the fence, the idea is to walk down the fence line and gather up each of the poles into one hand, letting the fence drape like a concertina to that side, I then walk to the new line and reposition them in the reverse order. This is where the ‘quick’ of the quick fence comes in. I am going to have to grow some muscles if I am to do that every day. I also need the grass to grow, it is very slow. We need a few showers.
Rather delightfully it said in the instruction booklet that the Quick Fence is easy to set up for people who read the instructions. It is only hard for the people who think they don’t need to read instructions, it reads. My Dad always said, when all else fails – read the directions. That always made me laugh. My Dad would have read the instructions thoroughly before beginning.
Kupa is out now. It looks like the girls are too young to lay eggs so he is allowed out to play. The peahens can stay in the penthouse a little longer. But I did miss Kupa.
Good morning. I hope all is well with you. My fence is still standing and Daisy is waiting at the gate for the milking. So I had better get busy. The weather is still just right to work in. The growers are driving their tractors at speed up and down the country roads, tilling and planting their corn and beans. Dust mixed with sprays is in the air. They are late this year. I can hear them out there already, a steady drone of large engines. Our fields have been sprayed with round-up already (sigh) and I am sure that the corn will go in soon.
You all have a lovely day.
your friend, celi
The Kitchen's Garden 
73 responses to “how not to put up an electric fence”
So pleased your wee Author is home again! E
She spent all day following me about and laying in the grass with Blue wherever i was working, I think she is pleased to be home too .. poor wee duck.. c
I forgot to mention your bees come to visit every day……..I have decided to make part of the potager a small wildflower meadow of borage for them!
Good morning Celi; instructions are for those that have not done something like that before. once you have done that you no longer need instructions glad to see author in better shape have a blessed day mike
Well i am glad i read them, and yes, it will be much easier from now on.. morning mike.. c
It’s amazing what a determined person can do alone, even on a task that “requires” more than one person. I hung gutters on my house by myself. It was not easy!
My brother had this to say about instructions: “You know what instructions are, don’t you? Just another man’s opinion.”
Excellent!! just another man’s opinion.. because i am alone on the farm all summer i find that i can do most anything if I go slowly and think, thinking is so under-rated!! morning… c
A second person would not have helped me on that gutter projects. I had but one ladder.
ah, i see your problem.. c
One people and a pig…brilliant!
Sheila was desperate to get out and help so she just shouted suggestions from her pen.. morning tanya.. c
i am surprised that you use round up. monsanto is not my favorite company. but then i have no experiance with big fields and such things 😉 happy to hear that author is fine. no more kittens for her i guess… have a wonderful day miss c!
I don’t use round up, the big fields are not in my care, they belong to someone else, i am surrounded in thousands and thousands of square miles being farmed using monsanto’s products .. It is cheaper to spray, so that is what they do.. no-one knows any other way anymore.. but it is not sustainable.. not at all.. c
it is sad that people dont know other ways… i always find permaculture inspiring. i think there is a lot to lear there. happy to hear that you are not using round up. it did not really fit in the picture of you in my head and i was not sure where to put it. thanks for putting that straight!
Thank goodness, If the fields were mine I would plant hazelnuts or grapes or apples! Wouldn’t that be amazing!
it would be, i am sure!
One people and a pig—-:-) The fence directions were pretty funny, too. Wonder how many actually read it?
I am so new to farming that i read all the instructions, you never know what gems you pick up! c
I am astonished that Big Dog is so deeply gender biased. I think Sheila needs to set him straight. Good morning, c, and the best of Thursday to the farmy!
Big Dog is a mans dog, he spends his days waiting for John to come home, lying somewhere watching the road, if he could speak i am fairly sure that is what he would say. Dear old fella.. c
I thought it was a man thing only to read the directions after sheer desperation has set in – like with asking for some? 🙂
I know men who will only turn the navigation on in their cars (or phones) as a last resort! they wait until they have circumnavigated the entire town saying.. “I know it is somewhere in here”. Looking from side to side! .. c
I’ve done that 😦
my husband reads all the fine print before he touches anything. i never look at directions. they bore me to death. blue looks like such a good helper!
John is the same, he has been know to take the book of words for some gadget to BED with him for light reading.. c
Those electric fences can be a bugger! Especially when doing it by yourself, or with the help of wild and crazy pets! Good on you!!! xoxoxo
I had three cats and two dogs who managed to get into the firld with me and was watched by the pigs, Hairy, the cows and Ton who was frantically trying to keep the cows from taking off the gate to get back in! c
Oh, why bother with directions. I often find them too complicated. But these fence directions are at least amusing. The tangled fence reminds me of strings of tangled Christmas lights. You wrote that this is a solar powered fence. Now that I find interesting. I never liked electric fences, especially when the cows or steers escaped and trampled them and I had to help chase the animals back inside the fence. I never trusted that they wouldn’t trample me. And my dad could never understand my fear as a little girl facing a hulking animal.
it has a solar charger and is actually inside an existing fence, we had to find a really tall electric fence this time because of Daisy’s history of Jumping them! c
I’m trying to think of a caption competition for the shot of the big animals in the newly fenced field – I really am wondering what they are all thinking and saying to each other… probably something about one people 🙂 Right I’m bunking off now to go to the allotment, it’s sunny but the wind is up and its a bit brr
They are definitely exchanging some smart comment! c
Use screwdriver, apply hammer and then try and read the instructions after the dog has torn pieces off most of the pages. 🙂 Laura
sounds about right!! c
Love it! TonTon is helping by sitting!
morning yummy! c
That’s funny C! I’m the instruction reader in our family, hubby just gets right into it like you did; half the time it doesn’t work out. I find products made in China the most difficult to understand because they are translated from Chinese to English.
Oh I know and the english is often so dreadful, one wonders who has the job of translating!.. c