I am getting tired, feeding kittens all through the nights for the last wee while is taking its toll. And I am afraid we are going to lose the middle kitten too. I have done everything I can, but yesterday he began to fail and sit hunched over, although I feed him tiny drinks frequently he is not choosing to eat now. I have to force him to drink now.
The Marmalade kitten, who arrived big and strong and loud is streaking ahead. I am considering the possibility that he is older than the others and not even from the same litter. The little fella is voracious and has never looked back. He has a big thirst for life. We should applaud this but always we feel sad for the little sick ones. Our failures loom into our bright successes blocking out their sun.
I feel I am letting you down when we were so high on the delight of it – rescuing these wee cats and now things are going wrong. I spoke to the vet and as usual he asks a few questions and says – Just keep doing what you are doing and see how he is tomorrow.
So tomorrow I am taking the day off from the blog. I need to regroup and find my happy again. I have not even had time to answer all your glorious comments – I do apologise. It is not only the cats, I think I am tired and achy and aimed straight at a Washing Basket Moment if I don’t give myself a stern talking to. Did I mention that cats make my nose run, my eyes itch and my head hurt? This is why I don’t have inside cats anymore. I have worked hard this summer, filling the freezers and cellar with food, winter is coming and I am not ready. I need to get the tractor out tomorrow and concentrate on the barn and bringing the ark across and work on the gardens and shift the pig fence. Already I feel better confessing this all to you. Writing lists helps they say.
I hope you all have a good day.
I promise to be back on form tomorrow.
love your friend, celi.
ps, Just out of interest here is the Daily View exactly a year ago. Here is the walkabout post from that day. I need to mow the lawns as well.
And this post is from two years ago. Ah yes we go back that far many of you and I.
c
The Kitchen's Garden 
64 responses to “grizzle, drizzle, fizzle”
You don’t have to be on form for us. We always love you as are.
You’ve tried so hard. Sometimes our best is not enough and nature takes its course. Have a piping hot cup of tea and a good rest.
Keep your chin up friend. Being a good farmer requres a big heart that sometimes gets bruised. Hugs from afar.
I will never forget the washing basket. And it is at times like this that we all love you the most, I think it is safe to say. We’re not here because we want you to put on a brave show for us. We just want to be taken along with you, come what may.
Hugs from Lyn!!
Wrote much more but the post got lost (again) stupid computer LOL
Courage. What will be will be, and you’ve done your best to produce the best outcome. You’ve worked so hard and write such wonderful posts, I wish I could give you a hug to help you feel better. Kate
Rather than giving yourself a stern talking to … give yourself some love or pampering 🙂 Really, tired is not good, and we should be striving to reach the heights and excellent example you set. Do what you have to at your own pace and we will be here waiting when you are ready. Laura
Have your meltdown, Honey…it’ll be better after. Big hugs to everyone out there…
Take a rest Celi… take a rest.. i get tired just think about what you do… don’t know how you cope…
It is difficult with rescuing orphans, or healing the injured when there can be little or no communication or understanding. It always broke my heart to lose little orphans, or to realize an injury could not be healed for some wild animal who needed help. Doing your best with a loving heart is all that is required really. We often wonder the “whys” of nature, but it is not so different than the things we question of our own lives. Try to think of the gift these wee kittens offered all of us… moments of delight in front of the lens of your camera, bringing exposure to the gift of life – regardless of how long that lasts, and reminding us that our loving and caring hands do make a difference in the world. I think of you with love this morning Celi, and send positive energy your way.
Be kind to yourself today. I think it is amazing that you write to us every day and acknowledge our comments. Takes real commitment. When all else fails, go hug a dog or two or three (it works for me and the girls dont mind getting hugs they didn’t expect 🙂 Joy
I’m sad that you’re sad. It’s no wonder you’re tired with the amount of work you get through, not to mention sleepless nights.
Dearest Celi
Please don’t feel too sad…we must remember the kitties had a very rough start to begin with, many strikes against them at the start. You have done everything possible to recover them but sometimes it is just too late to undo previous damage in such tiny little bodies. It’s time for you to give your mind and body a little rest…what will be, will be…….not every battle can be won. And if Marmalade thrives and grows…well that’s just a huge accomplishment! We all wish we could be there to help you, dear friend……:)
hoping.hoping.hoping….
As I said about kitten one, you gave them joy in this world that they wouldn’t have had otherwise…you and Boo. And joy to us, as those commenting already have said. Now it’s time for you to rest and I hope in time get some pampering, too. You work so hard and are “on” every waking minute of the day. Even the strongest, most hard working and productive living thing needs time “off,” be it plant, animal or human. It’s been a rougher year for you so far, it seems to me, in that there have been lots of hard decisions and some losses within that, in addition to so many projects and more responsibility with your animals. And still every day you are here with us, to tell us about it all, and we are grateful. But we all understand if you need a day, maybe more, just to regroup. We will all be here cheering you on. 🙂