Put your hands in the soil every day.
This was my grandmothers advice. She was discussing with me how I should behave when I became a wife. I was being brought up to be a good wife. There was no discussion from the women in my family, about following my heart or whether I had some wonderful talent or even really having a job, I could start as a nurse or teacher if I must, but most of the discussion from my mother and grandmother was on how to run a house, how to cook, how to raise my children and how to be a good wife. And this was in the 1970’s.
However a lot of my grandmother’s advice does hold true. All my life I have put my hands in the soil and this has kept me grounded, literally as well as figuratively. It works.
Yesterday we discovered that a young family in a small town close to here, were all dead. Two adults and three children. All killed by the mother, she shot her partner, her three small children and then shot herself. I know you do not want to read this. I know my language is harsh. I am too terse maybe. Most of us do not even want to think about it. But Life is harsh. A lonely life in a small town, with no friends or family,( they had recently moved there) must be dreadfully hard. The town is about twenty minutes from here and I drove through it once. It is small and grey. The streets are empty. The curtains are closed. The children are bused out to schools elsewhere.
I did not know this woman or her family. But I wonder: if she had been putting her garden to bed for the winter, and watching the weather. If she had been deadheading and bringing in pots. If she had been sorting next years squash seeds and checking to see if they were dry enough for the children to bag and label. If she had a larder full of preserves. If she had to check her pumpkins for soft spots. And sort the good potatoes out. Would she have picked up a gun, loaded it and shot her own children. Even if she had been struggling with a mental illness and I can only assume she must have been. And I know how dreadful that struggle is. I do know. Would she have gone this far? Maybe. All I know is that your hands in the soil is the best way to mitigate that merciless loneliness. This I know too.
Phase two of the Farmy has been moved up. We need to bring the children and their families onto the Farmy. As well as cooking, we need to help the young people feed their families. We must try to find a way to break the isolation.
So, now that we are up and running, we want to create an environment for local families to come and work on the Farmy. Grow their own food, garden, raise their own beef and lamb or pork. Pat daisy. Play with the cats, and be chased about by Mia. Muck out the barn, mow, garden, prune, pick, cook. Just a few families, we will stay small. But imagine helping young families fill their freezers and jars with food that they have grown themselves. Teaching the kids to cook, preserve and run wild down the back. Giving the Mum’s a break on the verandah. But in a normal neighbourly way. An old fashioned way.
I read another beautifully crafted story this morning here and it tied in so completely with what I am so clumsily trying to say. I want to encourage other people on other properties to help people grow gardens. I want to encourage anyone with a backyard or a sunny deck or a windowsill to grow. Teach a kid to cook. Teach a kid to grow. Teach a kid to eat well. Teach a kid to eat well and grow while sitting in a tree.
So firstly, we need to help people get in contact with other like minded people, for example: bloggers who think, bloggers who eat good food, bloggers who grow good food, bloggers who take great shots of good food, Oh My that is YOU!
I have opened a FaceBook page. I need writers, photographers, cooks, eaters, consumers, shoppers, gobblers, happy people, knitters, readers, gigglers, gardeners, ponderers, poets, sad people, farmers, drinkers (oh that’s me) I need advisers. I want to repost all the good stuff. I want you to lean over my fence and share the seeds. I want us to be able to find each other. I want us to plant gardens in the spring.
Did you know that in New Zealand they are trying to pass a law so that people cannot grow, share or trade home grown food, i.e. cabbages, broccolli, corn, beans, lettuce, spinach, seeds, seedlings, even water, WATER!? what about a fish, or a roast, a cup of sugar, a pint of milk, the list goes on. It is true! They are trying to outlaw growing and sharing food. In fact they plan to have Food Safety Officers to enforce this. This is madness. Grow a garden! Start digging New Zealand! We will dig with you!
Because, if someone had leant over the fence and said to the woman in the little town not far from here, who they are burying this week, and whose name I do not know. If someone had leant over the fence and said, ‘Here are some tomato seeds, you can sow them next month, in the window, send over the kids I will show them how.’ Maybe, just maybe that would have given her breath enough to go on for another day or the breath to ask for help.
If this terribly sad woman had known that to survive she could put her hands in the soil every day. Even in a tiny pot of parsley on her windowsill. Maybe, just maybe things would have been different. And there would not be five funerals this week.
So, if you want to join my tiny revolution, to help everyone plant a vege garden and share the food and share the knowledge and SHARE THE FOOD!!. Test my Facebook link and see if I have set it up right. Press like and share the like. And lets support each other and find each other and get together and grow. It is a tiny revolution.
I think we can do this. I think we can. I really think we can. Do I sound like ‘ The Little Train that Could’? Can we change the world one garden at a time? Is it against the law to plant vegetables on the median strip!?
c
The Kitchen's Garden 
103 responses to “Is it against the law to plant vegetables on the median strip?”
There is evidence that living in an urban environment devoid of trees and wildlife is not very good for our mental state. I feel a lot better inside when I can walk through woods and parks, but most of the time I’m left with concrete roads and chicken kebab shops as my main view. So many people here tarmack over their entire front garden so they can fit cars onto it. The greyness of it all gets me down.
When I lived in London I saw a lot of the concreted over gardens too and often they were right next to a riot of flowers in the neighbours garden. One wonders how they could make such a decision. And in the winter that greyness is hard on the heart. Just the tiniest plant can help us. c
I’ve clicked the like button C, which simply doesn’t convey me feelings strongly enough. I’ll pop over to Facebook and link in. Basically I’m with you ALL the way. I lost a dear friend to suicide this year, and we are still reeling. Isolation is a killer. Simple. But horrid.
And I KNOW the difference gardening has made to me, My allotment has helped keep me saner during tough times. And I know there are many others like me out there.
So I want to wish you and John all the very best out on the farmy. As to practical help? let me know kid!
Suicide is a dreadful thing, especially as we know, we know for sure, that things WILL get better, they always do, life is not stagnant. We will work together this spring to bring in a few more gardeners. With your seed saving and sharing you have already made a difference i am sure.. c
This is a wonderful post, so sad, but so hopeful too. Thank you. Like you I’m convinced that growing a garden gives hope and life, a consciousness of the continual cycle of nature that puts temporary difficulties and worries into perspective. I’m just going to look at your Facebook page now.
Thank you honey and hopefully we can all work on helping our neighbours plant a garden too.. c
Count me in, Celi. Maybe I should create a Misk Cooks account on Facebook. Maybe after Christmas when I have a minute spare to catch my breath. 🙂
We will keep everyone in touch any way we can, and I know with your inventive brain you will have tons of ideas! c
So sad, so touching. I am impressed so much. You did a great post, Thank you, with my love, nia
Thank you Nia, living in that big city you must know of many people who respond to your lovely smile and helping hand.. c
That story is just so very very very sad – there is nothing else to say.
You are right, enough has been said, now we will start doing.. c
What a moving and very sad life story!
No pictures today Mimo. c
So very, very sad. And you spoke the truth – perhaps just one glimmer of hope would have helped that mother make it through another day, and her children. And perhaps their lives would have been changed enough that their story would have been completely different. It is important to be grounded, to cook, to plant, to grow, to realize there are others in this world that will help. I’m afraid isolation has crept into our society – even neighbors rarely talk – much less sit on the back porch and enjoy a glass of ice tea and some cookies. But the world can be changed. And you have already started to make that change – I salute you!
We needs to work together Phyllis, in the summer we will start sharing plants, so when you plan your garden this year put a few extra seeds in for some plants to share! That might be the plant that makes the difference. c
Outlaw growing and sharing food – outrageous! Urgh!!!
So sad about the family C so very sad!
Just liked your FB page – heading over to have a look-see and share.
😉 Mandy xo
Isn’t it the strangest thing!? That law, I am still gobsmacked about the whoe thing. What are they thinking about? Is it Monsanto and the seeds? taxes? What!? I will do more research. thank you for joining the facebook, This will be the headquarters for the garden. We have to start making a plan.. c
Too true! Too many of us have lost our way, our connections to the earth and nature of which we are part. Amazing post–I’m in!
Excellent. We will make a difference. c
Reblogged this on Raven Mist Farm and commented:
I was working on a post this weekend about how exciting it is to go through seed catalogs after the holidays to while away those long, cold, dark days of winter. Cecilia’s post goes beyond what I was trying to convey and I could not say it better–well worth the read. Thanks Cecilia.
Thank you, This is an important message and I am very grateful that you have helped me share it! c
I love your blog. That’s all I can say right now.
I hear you though.. c
Heartbreakingly sad and yet hopeful. May that tragic little family rest in peace in a better place. I love your ideas and join you in spirit with my hands in the soil at our farm! Still harvesting lettuce and other greens from our greenhouse, even though it was 10 degrees F last night!! We share your ideals here at Mehaffey Farm!
You do maggie, I just dropped over to your site and I am thrilled that you found me. Maybe in the spring as we go around our people we should give away a couple of zucchini seedlings! or something like that! We surely are the lucky ones! c
Your capacity for compassion is evidently in the fact that you can read that horrible story and feel for the mother. You are such a good person with wonderful intentions. The world needs so many more of you. Thank you for telling this difficult story in such a compassionate manner.
We can all make a difference, no matter how small. And we should all feel some responsibility for each other, which is hard. Our way will be to plant a garden and then help someone else plant theirs. This way we will spread out the compassion. c
Such a tragic story, Celi, but your prescription is what’s needed here. A day or two on the farm and the resultant contact with others just might have helped pierce the isolation. I’m very lucky here. My neighbors are about as ethnically diverse as you can get and everyone talks over the fences and across the yards as if this were 1965. It makes living here really special.
You are lucky and that makes for such a healthy environment. I bet you are passing over dishes of food as well.! Really good. I love hearing that.c