Against all the odds, and rattling like an old train when he drinks (antibiotics are not helping him – they seldom do help such young bony animals) The Little Bobby is still alive.
Yesterday afternoon I shifted him into the small pen close by my bedroom window and gave him small sips of colostrum (I have jars of frozen colostrum in my freezer) . This is the last weapon in my arsenal.
He is by far the worst affected because of his small size but he continues to fight (he came in weighing 58 pounds and the man said no-one else bid on him at the sale because of it). His diarrhea continues unabated and he suffers silently and stoically.
I brought him into this outside pen close to the house (with a little hut) so he could die outdoors. but stay isolaated from the other animals, having a sick animal on the farm terrifies me. But I feel strongly that animals, when they die, and we all will, need to be able to breathe clean air and see the stars.
Not die in a nasty dark corner of the barn surrounded in flies.
This is what I would want for myself. To die inside would be hell for me and my children and my husband have been instructed that if we have the chance and the choice to carry me outside or at the very least make sure there is an open window close to me. And never, never let me die in a hospital.
Goodness I am maudlin this morning. But we should all make these decisions and leave instructions with our kin, just in case.
But the animals cannot choose so I choose for them and even though the Little Bobby has battled on this long and I will continue to battle with him, if he is to die today, at least he is lying under a tree wearing his warm jacket until the sun comes up, with cats in the branches and dogs close by. He can hear the roosters crowing and he can hear me moving about. Surely that is better.
Three of the other calves in the West barn, though still having bouts of scours, get up the moment I enter the barn and are eating and drinking with vigour. One I am having to force to eat but I have decided to switch her to colostrum too today. They all still get three big drinks of electrolyte a day and small milk drinks the other three feeds. There first feed is at six and the last one at about 11.30pm so it is a long day. We are under the care of the vet and doing everything we can. It is all about the fluids. As much electrolyte as possible is the most important thing, then some food.
The bottles are warm now so I shall get going.
I hope you have a lovely day. I have already found loveliness in the sunrise. The Little Bobby and I watched it rise during his pre-dawn feed which he drunk enthusiastically.
Much love
celi
The Kitchen's Garden 
86 responses to “Still alive”
I have such a heavy heart over this news. Hugs to you, c. xx
He has been drinking well this morning though and all the others drunk very well just now.. c
Then we can be hopeful?
It ain’t over ’til the fat lady sings Misky.. he just stood up and drank a little more before moving to a dappled but sunnier spot and lying down again..Boo has on watch I am in for coffee.. c
I’ll keep you all in my thoughts today. Much love. xx
Poor Little Bobby – I’m sure he’s getting the very best attention a calf could have 🙂
If…and I do so hope that he doesn’t…if he should die, I do hope having known such care and attention makes a difference and that he passes with a peaceful mind. :-). You’re an amazingly compassionate person, Ms. C. Thank you.
Wishing both you and Bobby Little, strength to push through today to a full recovery. Laura
With sheep, there are different causes for scours and different treatments for each cause. Coming from a yard, have you treated for coccidia…?
The Vet is on it.. c
Something else that crossed my mind to share while sitting on the tractor this afternoon worrying about you and your poor baby is we have a new vet in the area, a very experienced young sheep vet from New Zealand, who told me not to dilute milk or formula very much with lambs (so maybe all ruminants?) because they need a certain percentage of the – might have been protein, but could have been the fat or something else – in order for their bodies to digest it. Too thin and it won’t curdle like it’s supposed to. Probably doesn’t apply to this situation, but wanted to share for future.
Hmm – that is very good information.. so best to eat less at full strength.. in this situation? That kind of makes sense? And thank you for thinking of us whilst out on your tractor – the things we think of when in that seat! Jonny Depp comes to mind!!
I have a huge lump in my throat reading this, I do hope he survives and the others too. I will be sending you all of my positive thoughts today. The sunshine and fresh air is always good.
I agree, in fact later today i hope jake can help me get the outside run ready for the West Wing calves.. I think they are well enough to come outside too.. coming outside is a well thing and a sick thing I guess! c
I am crying of course. Couldn’t be helped. Oh well. I had a difficult moment with a dressing room mirror this morning, and this has put the cherry on top of my mood. Nature will do what nature will do. Whether it’s a wee calf hanging in the balance or the woeful appearance of back-fat under the bra strap. Best to look at the lovely warm sun in both cases.
Ah back fat – I think you need to know that every woman gets that no matter her weight or size.. I think we should all put our heads together and design a decent bra that suits a mature figure.. c
I’m all in for a better designed bra! Being a very ‘large’ all ‘natural’ woman – they have yet to make a bra that fits me!!!
And your post while sad is also lovely. I agree, no hospitals! I want my animals surrounding me if I have any at the time I pass. And I want my ashes spread on the coast of Texas in the warm waters.
We are much kinder to our animals than we are to our sick and elderly. You are giving the wee calf the best you can and I think his pen must be lovely.
Don’t forget to have the closure at the front where there is a chance of seeing what you are doing!
I can’t stand bras and rarely wear them. I wear a camisole instead.
Very late to comment, was starting to, but had to leave. Just to let you know that little roll that bothers us so much is there for a purpose : so that if we reach old age we have some fat reserves (and the fat on our backs is actually different than around the body) as our capacity to obtain nourishment from food becomes greatly diminished.No real science here, just empiric observation. Our body is always trying to protect us although sometimes we really hate the way it chooses to do it. Yes best to look at the warm sun.
Wonderful! now we will love the roll and eat it when we are old! Thank you celia
and we still need a bra that Loves that nice little fat roll, not squishes it UP and OUT!
Ah, thank you! Excellent perspective. I shall try to love my back fat instead of loathing it!
Hi C!
What a sad situation…poor Little Bobby…but you are right, when ready he’ll be in a beautiful place. Thanks for sharing. Take care!
G
You take care too darling girl with all your wonderful food.. c
Sending positive energies and strength your way. xo
Ah Celi, we should all have someone like you in our lives, helping us make difficult decisions and transitions with compassion. If your love, care and dedication can pull Little through, then he’ll pull through, and if not, he’ll have had the best life a sick baby could hope for and a gentle passing in the clean bright air.
You do have me in your life and you in mine (and now on my wall!!) .. love your friend c
Oh good! I hope it does its job… XOXOXOX
Beautiful flower-shot. Nasturtium is the English name? Mine is just half as much, due to our cold May and June. Love the Boo face, he always looks so severe and dignified.
“… to breath clean air and see the stars” – you made me cry, Celi. It is so touching how you care for your little ones. So much love in…. “He can hear the roosters crowing…”, oh my. So so sweet. Have to fight back my tears. Your heart is so wide and open! – Your instructions for your own death are great. Outside or with an open window the soul has a short and direct way up to the stars…
On Monday an uncle passed away – outdoors, fell from his bike, just so (maybe a stroke). He was dead at once and did not suffer at all. I’ll be at his funeral on Fridays. He was near his eighties (or more).
Wow, I want to die like that – outside riding on a bike.. good for him… c
I remember a discussion with two dear elderly friends. One of them wanted to die on the tennis court, preferably serving an ace, and the other – who had a canal narrow boat – wanted to die navigating a long flight of locks called Tardebigge. Neither achieved their ambition – they didn’t have a Celie, determined and caring. Both exits would have caused chaos, but so what!
I hope Little perks up today, and the others. They have the best chance, with you around.
love,
ViV xoxox
First of all, I laud your wishes to die in sight of the stars. Me? I have instructed my children that, just before I die, they bring me a bucket so I can kick it. My last joke on life. Love, Gayle
What a great way to go!
I too want to die outside ….where I can see the stars and the moon or the sun. My Daddy passed away on a trip. He was hitching up the trailer ready to head on from a trip across the nation. It was horrible on Momma…but it made me glad for Daddy. He was doing exactly what he wanted to do…no hospital, nursing home or long lingering illness. What a gift for him!
Linda
http://coloradofarmlife.wordpress.com
Your family is great!
What a wonderful thought, to be outdoors when the body takes a final breath.
Bless you for what you provide all the animals in your care. You are my hands and feet in treating all creatures the way we would be treated.
Holding you in my heart today. Your care of your animals shows me what humans are made of and what we all should be doing for every living thing in our lives. Bless you.
Tough situation! I grew up on a small farm and remember this all-out effort well; at least we had three kids to rotate the duty!
I know you are working with a vet, but are your scouring calves getting kaolin or pectin as well as electrolytes?
LynnT
I had not thought of pectin but I do have some and i will do some research – thank you – at present they do have apple cider vinegar in their drinking water which contains a little pectin –