.. something happened. I did not want to tell you because maybe you would think I was stupid and leave me. But then I thought maybe you do stupid things too (I hope) and it would be a relief for you to read about other people doing stupid things (I hope). Though you should never CALL someone stupid – not to their face. If you tell someone he is stupid he will BE stupid. Name calling lowers ones game. It teaches us nothing.
You see, for a number of days my phone was not ringing. There was no sound at all just the vibration. I played with the buttons on the side turning it up and down. I went into settings and fiddled about – nothing. I discovered a few hairline cracks in the glass so I assumed it had been damaged.
So (in the absence of a teenager) while I was in town the other day I took my phone into the shop where I bought it -I had all my insurance papers in order. I was ready for a long and protracted Carry On. I walked into the store, cockily said Hullo to The Greeter before she saw me, walked with confidence across to the phone department and was met by a terribly nice young man who was probably about twelve years old. He put down the device he was working with, giving me his full attention. I explained my predicament and he smiled and reached out his hand and said ” Can I see the phone?” “Sure”, I said and handed the offending device over. He took it in the palm of his hand, tilted it slightly to look at the side buttons, flicked one with a fingernail and said “You had the Mute on.”
My eyes widened, my pulse elevated and a blush spread across my face as I did a quick search of the immediate area to see if anyone SAW! “Oh”, I said, grabbing my phone and stuffing it back into my bag – at speed. “Thank you.”I smiled and laughed, as you would. “Silly me”! I said. “I am so sorry”. He was awfully gracious “Happen to anyone, sometimes the covers slip over the button, I love your accent, where are you from?” But with a wave I was already out the door and hurrying for my used cooking oil car, almost running down The Greeter who was outside having a smoke, as I bolted for the carpark . Can you imagine – the embarrassment?!
Now, if you think that was stupid listen to this. Yesterday I was off to buy feed and so I dressed accordingly and I took out my clean town shoes, (I never wear farm shoes where other farmers might be walking). These shoes are green Converse shoes. I love them. I put one shoe onto one foot then remembered something in the kitchen so with one foot shod and one in a sock I ran from the bedroom to the kitchen. Saved my coffee or whatever it was, I cannot remember, then I raced back to the bedroom to put the other shoe on but Icould not see it, i searched and searched but NEVER found the second shoe again. It had vanished! For ages I hobbled about the house with one shoe on and one shoe lost, backtracking and retracking myself looking for the other clean green Converse shoe. GONE.
I had to change my trousers to accommodate boots (I only have one pair of shoes) and then went Out and Back again. It was not ’til much later in the evening that I found my beautiful clean green Converse shoe on the shelf next to the microwave in the pantry. What WAS I thinking not looking for my shoe on the shelf next to the microwave in the pantry!
Here is another Stupid Story. Because of the cold breezes coming into the barn now I gave each set of pigs a whole bale of straw to play with and so they could snuggle down in the lea of the bale, out of the cold, and sleep. Well, the day before Yesterday I was talking to one the Plonkers in the barn, when behind me I heard a noisy excited scuffle namely Tahiti (above) and Molly, the two Hereford gilts, shoving their bale of straw up against the gate then climbing up onto it and launching themselves over the gate like fish sliding out of a bucket – straight onto my feet. “Merciful heavens”, I said much surprised, “how long have you been practicing that little trick.”
“It worked.” they screamed with delight to each other and merrily began to gnaw on my boots!
Needless to say I took out my trusty farmers knife and slit (there is that nasty word again) the strings on their bale of straw before opening the gate and letting them back in.
I think I need to drink more water! Obviously I am so distracted lately I am losing my MIND.
Did you see what Boo is looking at in the header shot? Here it is again.
The big hunter. Have a lovely day,
Our new Dexter heifer should be coming today! I will keep you posted.