HOW MANY ANGELS

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin. A medieval question. Philosophy or physics.

It is a beautiful image of course. Dancing angels on shiny pins.

Angels. Ghosts. Infinity. Transparent. Pointless.

A man shot his wife, his grown son and his neighbor early Christmas morning in the same town where my Mother in Law lives. A tiny country town. Sparkling with Christmas decorations. Not a pretty town except in autumn. A working town with empty shop fronts and a grocery store. A few hundred people. The museum and a little library, the post office and a bank. Ordinary. Quiet. No night life. Windows closed and curtains drawn. Sidewalks rolled up at dusk.

Then an eruption of such violence early Christmas morning. A working man shooting his son, his wife and their neighbor in the head. Point blank. Cleaned up then called the police.

A few hours later on Christmas morning, we were surprised to have to take a small detour to get to her house because of road blockages and police tape, after discussing the situation we concluded that it was all still rumor, we had no facts, we guessed who might have killed whom, concluded we would wait for news and continued with our day. No consideration for our own safety. These things happen to other people of course.

The News did not mention it. There were no police on the street asking if anyone heard anything. No Hollywood reporters. No detectives in trench coats. No bright lights or hazmat suits. The poor bloody bodies had been removed I guess. Just a few police cars parked with flashing lights and yellow police tape tied to trees.

We had our Christmas lunch. The police lights occasionally flashing through the alley. Chattering on – the weather was warm – ball throwing weather.

So TonTon has gone to live with my Mother in Law- maybe for a while – maybe a very long while. I delivered him on Christmas Day. I would like to say it was because of the violence but mainly it was because she had been feeling lonely after losing her little old dog a few months ago and Ton was getting old and achy and snappy with boisterous Boo so it seemed a natural pairing. The discovery of the murders as Ton and I drive into town just underscored the necessity of a dog for her. Though I miss him. Maybe I was thinking of safety after all.

But I have always had a dog in my life and so has The Matriarch so I know the feeling. And then this violence – only a few houses from hers. She needs a well trained dog.

The angels dance on in a merry go round of pointlessness caught forever on their pin head, while we shuffle around on our mortal coil.

This morning – feeling the need to move – I am writing to you in the train. I will be back later today to shift pigs and so on.

Have a day! Wherever you are. Just grab it and have it.

Love love

Celi

47 responses to “HOW MANY ANGELS”

  1. I have no words. The violence, the shock of it, is overwhelming. I do not understand humans. It is a sad, sad way to end the year.

    a warm hug for you….

  2. Earlier this year a woman in our community, which is much like the Matriarchs in size, went missing. She had been seen last at the hospital being treated for injuries from a beating (husband). They found her in dead, in the house. Four houses down our lane. It looked like CSI out there for a week. Husband was arrested for the crime. You think you live in the peaceful countryside, but there is family violence everywhere. It is unsettling when it happens, to say the least. Dogs are a great comfort in the sense of the security they bring.

  3. About five years ago, a man was shot and killed at his home in our small country town. He was to have been a witness at a mob trial in another state. A man posing as a service worker was permitted into his home. The man shot his dog, then sat him down at his desk and shot him in the back of the head. It shook our town for about two days. It’s now on a dusty shelf in back room of our memories.
    Bob Jones

  4. Tears here. Words scatter, knowing they might be pressed into some sort of service they know they aren’t capable of. Hugs to you. Ton will bring comfort and joy (and safety) and that was so good of you.

  5. Oh my, we have had some very upsetting murders recently here in Maine. Very sad and unsettling. I don’t even begin to understand how someone could reach that point. I am sure that Ton is a welcome addition to your MIL’s home. He does deserve a nice retirement!

  6. That is truly awful. So sad for the relatives. Ton will have an easy time of it now, no more pesky pigs ect to watch.

  7. I don’t know how many Angels fit on the head of a pin. The one I saw filled the whole corner of my room with light. Being a prison guard or a policeman gives one an altered view of the world. Maybe hopelessness. It’s so sad when people hurt those they supposedly love. You made a good decision for Ton and the Matriarch. Doing what is best for both. Going into the city will clear your heart a little. Enjoy you time away. I did that yesterday, going to the mall for a fast, warm walk and then caught the movie “Last Christmas” It was an odd start to the movie but the ending was so heartwarming I wanted to sit quietly with it for a while. First good movie I’ve seen in a long while. Mr. Rogers was good as well. I don’t see movies often and was glad not to be disappointed. It gave my heart a lift too. Have a happier New Year, Miss C. It has to get better.

  8. How can anyone make sense of a horror like you describe. I always wonder if this unexplained violence is happening more, or we simply know of it so readily with so many avenues available to spread the horror. And, how many we do not hear of, as seems apparent in this story.
    I hope your MIL feels more secure with Ton and that he relishes his new lifestyle.
    I also hope that he took a good supply of sticks with him 😉

  9. A lovely new chapter for Ton and your Mother in law. A symbiotic relationship l’m sure. Hope you have a good 2020.

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