The sun is so low that when it does pop out through a crack in the solid grey that is our sky, all our shadows make us look like monsters. Screen left is Boo and screen right is Sheila. Off on our walk.
Everyone wants to check out the compost heap on the way.
Off they go. Boo was not a bother so he can come again, said Ton. As they left him behind.
Without our dear Kupa the hierarchy in the barn has changed – in the bird population. The roosters are scaring the pea hens away from the food. Kupa was such an unassuming bird I had no idea that he protected his girls while they ate. So I feed them upstairs.
Though they do make a habit of climbing into the pig food bins and eating the oats so I am not too worried. I will need to find them a new male though. It seems they need one for more than one reason.
Every farmer has an obsession about the weather and with no TV or radio and even though I do check the weather on the computer I was thrilled with MY Christmas present.
A weather station, it has a gizmo outside on top of the house for telling me wind speed and direction as well. Nothing dramatic yesterday, just bloody cold. (-8.5C). Of course now I am studying barometric pressure.
My ice champagne ice bucket waiting for New Years!..No threat of it melting.
I had a few thoughts yesterday. Some things I would like to see in the New Year.
WHAT IF they designed a movie theatre that had three screens, one in front and one on either side, you would need to shoot the movie with three different cameras simultaneously from three different Points of View but it would be pretty cool as a viewer, we would be right inside the movie, and if they were all 3D, that would be exciting – unless it was a horror movie then it would be horrible.
WHAT IF the supermarket aisles could read your grocery list or your grocery thoughts (some people like me forget to take their lists) and when you start looking for, oh – avocado oil, the sign in that aisle immediately changes to avocado oil, raising itself up and down gently to attract your attention. But only you could see it because the guy next to you is looking for quail eggs or hard wood floor cleaner or a life.
WHAT IF dishwashers were at waist level so you don’t have to bend down to load them and you didn’t have to rinse the dishes clean first covering the floor and your feet in water because you are working too fast because you HATE doing dishes.
WHAT IF houses had those sucky vacuum shutes, like they had in old department stores, in every single room and you opened a little hatch and shoved your laundry in there and woosh it was sucked straight to the machine. And another sucky thing on the wall that just sucked all the dust up.
WHAT IF the lights in your house had batteries. So you could hang them from anywhere and they did not need wires.
WHAT IF you could just throw all your devices in a pile in a special corner of the house or a special box in your car and they were wirelessly recharged. Without plugging in. So you could not lose your charger because you did not need one. You could park your light batteries here too to charge up. Plus possibly a brain or two, I know a number of brains that need a recharge, though I would rather not take my brain out of my head to be charged up ..that sounds a wee bit messy, it might be easier if I sit in the corner with all the other devices as well.
WHAT IF you had a special button on the wall that when you pushed it your cell phone calls out to you – I am over HERE! with flashing lights and wee oo wee oo noises. And one for the car keys too.
WHAT IF you could push another button and the entire wall of your bathroom raises up like a garage door (the one with the bath not the one with the toilet. That would be a mean trick to raise the wall up in the toilet when someone is sitting on the toilet just minding their own business and thinking about nothing much and then there is a click and a whir and the wall begins to roll up. I think that would be rude) and when the wall is raised you can wash the whole bathroom out with the hose then let it dry in the sun, but not today as it is too cold. Everything turns to ice so fast in the cold, the dogs have a drink out of their heated water dish and the drips from their mouths freeze onto the verandah floor and stay there. Daisy has icicles. Imagine what a hose in your bathroom would do.
WHAT IF they had bed units in airports that you can rent for an hour or even two when your plane was held up or you are between flights. Lined up along one wall like lockers. Just a box with a bed and a door that locked and an alarm that you can set. And a little lady at a desk saying mind you are out at 5 exactly or you will be charged for an extra hour and no friends, this is a clean establishment. You could take in your own water and a book.
WHAT IF it was a fashion to have 3 foot high hair-do’s, like the French in the 1700’s, with bird cages in them, how would we fit into our cars? We would be walking about the supermarket with our hair getting stuck in stuff. They would have to have extra staff with long sticks to help you get free. How would I wear my beanie?
WHAT IF women went bald, really bald – like men do, would there still be comb-overs? Were there ever comb-overs, I find it hard to believe.
WHAT IF my eyes were green, not pale blue, would I be a different kind of person?
WHAT IF cats could read your minds and there was nothing to read. You were having one of those perfectly innocent blank moments. Would they feel superior? Do they already?
Do you ever wonder about stuff like that?
May your New Year be full of glory and joy, to help you through the hard bits. There will be hard bits. Life is like a drain, sometimes it gets stopped up with hard bits. Joy is like an orange plunger or a wire brush, it makes things sparkly clean. So I wish you lots of joyful times. But we will be OK you and I, we have The Fellowship – and we are all wearing rubber gloves and wielding plungers. And laughing like drains!
Love your friend on the little farmy
celi
The Kitchen's Garden 
78 responses to “My Monsters and I go for a Walk and Wonder about Stuff”
That picture looks like two hounds of the Baskervilles 😉
Warn those roosters about time out ‘in the pot’ 🙂 Not sure which I like more – the ice bucket or the weather station. Very happy New Year and a productive and fruitful 2014 on the farmy. Laura
I have an answer for your comb-overs question, and the answer is YES! When I was on chemo, and totally bald for about 3 months, there were ladies who lost their hair more slowly, and had big bald patches, and they totally did comb-overs instead of shaving the lot. Can’t understand it…. It looks worse, if anything, on a woman, because the rest of the hair is longer than on a man. Happy New Year, dear Celi, to you, Our John, and the whole darling menagerie.
wishing you a very happy new year, Miss C
You and your blog are a tonic – Happy New Year and thank you so much for your friendship!
I so agree with Julie, Celi!!! You and your blog are a tonic!!! You make me laugh so often, and I carry your stories and advice throughout the days, and also make some yummy food from your recipes! 🙂 Wishing you, Julie and all of the Fellowship of the Farmy the Happiest of All New Years!!! xoxoxo
Got my rubber gloves on here (a bit difficult to type in them 🙂 )
Happy New Year to you, Celi, and to Our John, and all the Fellowship Folks!! “Cheers”
Where on earth did you get all l those weird What if, ideas?…actually if dishwashers were put on a table you would not need to bend down,….why is it always so dark in there..maybe putting a light inside would be good.
I loved your ideas, maybe one day some brilliant brain will put them into operation. I also loved the long shadows..really quite spooky!
I think it will be good to find the peahens a mate..they must miss Kupa just like the rest of us..
Did you buy your own present of a weather station? A verygood idea seeing as how you are so far out in the country….
I really hope that 2014 will be a great year for everyone but especially for you dear friend. May your chickens lay many eggs and your corn grow tall and plentiful…love P
OK Miss C the one what if is whearding me out at the airport it started to sound like a coffin. also women do go bald my mum is. bye
Mike, I hate to admit it but an average flight home to NZ is 11 hours, next time I am going to melbourne (18 hours) – if someone offered me a coffin to sleep in between flights – I would say thank you very much, take of my boots and lay my head down! Though i would like a mattress in mine please! They are not as comfy as they look, those coffins.. c
Even though I am one of those silent passer-by sort of visitors to this blog as my farmy is mostly a suburban back yard I so enjoy my morning reads of the goings-on in your world. Looking forward to 2014!
2014 is going to be the wildest yet! Hold onto your hat! c
I would love a weather station like that, but I don’t suppose the landlord would be happy with us putting a widget on the roof.
I love your what-if list, and can solve the dishwasher one for you: at our last house but one, I designed the kitchen so that the dishwasher was installed in a unit on top of a useful deep drawer to keep the dishwasher supplies in, with a work top on top at about my head height, where you can put stuff while you load the washer. It was up against the wall one end and near the sink at the other. Our dishwasher came with instructions that pre-rinsing was a waste of time (inutile in French).
I wonder how the peahens will welcome a new male.
Lovely post as usua, you aways cheer me up.
Love,
ViV
Happy New Year, miss c…. t
You are on fine fooling fun Miss C, my that brain has been whirring! My favourite photo is the monster photo – a classic. And as I have green eyes I’m now wondering if I would be a different Claire if they were blue let alone one of each!! Yikes and Crikey!!!
Love your “What If”s!! Here’s one I always think of when I am driving behind (or a driver is coming the other way) and can’t seem to keep to their side of the road – What If the solid yellow line in the middle of the road was like that toy you had as a kid that you had to pass a looped pole over the wire, and every time you touched the wire a buzzer went off. Only if the car went over the yellow line the driver got a mild electric shock?
Another one for drivers – What if the car wouldn’t turn a corner or make a turn (especially left)if you hadn’t indicated in plenty of time your intentions?
Love your weather centre, need to get me one of them! I am paranoid about the weather, but then I think every gardener/farmer is. Helps us to plan things and be somewhat pro-active instead of re-active!
Hugs Lyn
Well you can get a whole house vaccuum system. There are portals in the wall in each room/area to attach the hose. The long hose is a pain to lug around and store. I imagine they have improved a lot since the 70’s, which is my most recent experience with one. My best friend had one in her house and we had fun as kids playing that it was a giant snake. The lastest upgrade that I just discovered is that you can have a kick plate installed in the floor and just sweep your debris right into the system. That would be lovely.
I think laundry chutes should make a come back. I’ve lived in 2 old houses with them and I liked them. Bonus points if they can return the clean laundry to its proper room.
If you design a locater device for the phone and keys I will buy one. My location devices (kids) will all be gone from home soon and I will be stuck at home because I won’t be able to locate the phone to call anyone or keys to go any where. ;o)
I have often wished for a bathroom that could be sealed and cleaned/disinfected with a high pressure water system, especially after we have contracted a stomach bug.
The shadow photo reminds me of a folk art painting. It is amazing that you can take Sheila for walks and she doesn’t wander away.
Have a Happy New Year.
That monster photo is crazy GREAT!! Oooh, and I would love to have a sucky dust machine. I hate dusting the most of anything! Happy New Year Celi! Thank you for making my morning cup of coffee so enjoyable. I try every morning to visit the farmy before setting out for the day. You ROCK, my friend!!