So, after another stepping on the udder episode, the Vet and I spent some quality time with Lady Astor and I agree with him that her time here needs to come to a noble and dignified end.
Her udder is only going to get worse with time. And the risks of more injuries increase with time.
I know it is sad. But let’s keep this all in perspective. This world we live in has a great many more issues that deserve our attention and our emotion. Kids are starving. Kids are being shot at. Teachers are being shot at and killed right here in this country. Some families – families I know, cannot afford to go to the doctors. I can’t afford to go to the doctors here in the US (but I am older so that is not so bad). But what I mean is we can’t be babies about this – as the Old Codger used to say “No-one gets out of this life alive.”
Dealing with my cow who has worked hard all her life for the people in her life and has come to the end of this time is so simple in comparison to some of the very real tragedies that people have to deal with. It is a natural thing. It is the cycle of life. And she is a cow. Her vet bills have been astronomical this year.
And no, I am not hard hearted. I am a farmer. I know I am a woman so people may expect me to be gentler and sweeter but I am not. I adore this cow. She has been my favourite milk cow for years now but her time has come. I must do what is best for her and not what is easiest for me. I would keep her alive just so I did not have to face this decision. But I must give her the respect she deserves and allow her a dignified exit.
I feel miserable about this. I even hate these cutsie chocolate box cloud photos.
But I will take her to the abbatoir and I will lead her in so she is not afraid and I will stand with her until the end. Because she deserves that. We all deserve that. I will ensure that she is not wasted. Poor old lovely, for all the love in the world, she is a cow. She is not my son or my husband. She is a cow. We need to be real about these things. Our neighbours would be lucky to be loved as much as we loved this curmudgeon bad tempered kick-you-in the-face cow.
I have to add that the decision to let Lady go is just as hard as Telling YOU of my decision to let Lady go. So please do not give me a hard time.
She leaves on Thursday.
I am not having a good day – I hope yours is better.
Celi
The Kitchen's Garden 
72 responses to “OK”
Sending you a big hug!
I’m in tears, even though you are so very right. Thank you for sharing her with us, Miss C. I would take that final walk with the two of you if I could. Sending peace.
Me too… ❤
Love and hugs! Adios Lady Astor…
I admire, respect and support you so very much for all these tough but caring decisions you have to make. Sending you a big, strong hug of friendship my lovely miss c.
Pax Lady Astor and Celi.
You know you are doing the right thing for her and you. And you will do it with dignity, grace and respect. I think we all know you will.
We are kinder to our animals when they are suffering than we are to our elderly. We put our elderly away in homes and go see them once and a while, while they deteriorate and grow older. I speak from experience there and I did it because it was what HAD to be done. If life’s decisions were all easy – wouldn’t life be just so boring? Peace dear friend.
Just went to the cast page – oh my 2014 was a tough year. I forgot how many exited stage right…..
It’s a very hard decision, but you are doing the right thing. I’m sure Lady Astor has had the very best life and care with you and John.
In a few days all this will feel less raw, c, so until then treat yourself with tender kindness.
With you through the good and the bad Miss C. Hugs.
A fellowship of loyal readers will help you carry the weight of this decision. We love to experience the joy, the funny and adorable moments on the farm. We must also be there for you when difficult decisions must be made. You can count on me.
You have made the right and kindest decision. I have always stayed with my dogs when we have had to have them put down, but that has been at home, I don’t know if I would have the guts to walk into an abbatoir. You are very kind and brave, good for you.
I agree with everything Janet writes here. I have always stayed with & held my dogs & cats at the vet till the very end. I hope I would be brave enough to walk into the abbatoir with a beloved cow. I admire you, Celi, & I’ll be there with you & Lady on Thursday, in spirit & in my thoughts.
She had a good home and served you well. I’m glad you will keep her company. Off to another level. Big hug.
I sometimes grow weary of making the ‘right’ decisions on the farm….my heart hurts with yours.
People who don’t farm ask me (with an accusatory justify yourself look) how I can make those decisions. I tell them ‘we love all our animals til death’ and walk away.
Friday will be a better day for you.
I am so sorry.
You are doing this with dignity, grace and with Lady in mind. I will be thinking of you the next few days. Blessings, love, peace and well being.
Diana