Much of the mantle of being grown-up is trying to establish some kind of order into a fluid and unpredictable, chaotic world. The world is full of streams we thoughtlessly and quite naturally push against. Wind, cold, water, weeds, muddle, mess, dirt, hunger, aging, spiders webs, illness, even death itself – without even conscious thought we scurry about under this enormous sky trying to instil some kind of order, some kind of logic into the completely natural turmoil that we call life.
As though we have the right. 
Creating a semblance of order from the natural chaos is pretty satisfying though.
Aunty Del and her big tall calves have been separated. They did a bit of crying in the night but not as much as some. Weaning is a hard time for the animals but these two are old enough. I will give them heaps of good hay to eat and they will settle quickly. They have the uniball steer with them now (the vet could still only find one testicle which he banded anyway. The steer (who has always had the nickname Lonely because he hangs out by himself) will grow to behave like a bull but will not be fertiile. However his nature is very recessive so he can stay and grow here and be a part of this herd of young’uns.
Lady Astor is having trouble with her udder. She is well but as she dries up and the udder shrinks inwards it is getting longer and drooping further downwards. She stood on it the day before yesterday and has a nasty graze down the side of one quarter. The udder is drying up healthily but the risk of this happening again and doing worse damage is very real.
Remember this is a farm and I must make sensible decisions. Decisions that are best for the animal and the running of the farm. I am not sure I can leave this outcome to luck. Relying on good luck is to invite chaos. Luck is random and seldom lands where it is earned.
Chaos is begun by the smallest of changes in our landscape. So being aware of the environment and adjusting or hitching ourselves to head off or accept each small change (and sometimes that adjustment in the fabric is a big one) is the only real way to live with our natural order of chaos. And some of those adjustments are unkind.
For the meantime Lady is happily hanging out in her field with Aunty Del eating everything she sees and putting on some weight. All I can do for the moment is watch and hope the udder will begin to shrink upwards before she struggles up from a sleep and stands on it again.
Cows are not graceful.
We can expect sun today which will be lovely for all involved.
I hope you find loveliness today.
Love celi
WEATHER: 20F/ -6C as I write, and morning sunlight is streaming through the windows. We still have the Nor’Wester which is holding the cold here.
The Kitchen's Garden 
50 responses to “ORDER”
Cecilia, many many years ago, I worked on a milk farm. Occasionally, we had cows with low hanging udders like yours. May think it harsh, but we used bandages, tied around the cow’s middle to hold up and support the udder… just what we did…
Actually that makes perfect sense.. I will think about this.
Thinking good thoughts for the drying udder. I always hate the drying off period… it has so many possible pitfalls. Love Ton and the two kitties!
She is healthy except her udder is very pendulous. It is hard to know what the best option is for her however it is also obvious that her productive days are over.. c
Our expectations so often make life more complicated than is should be. When we are born it would be useful to be given a manual with a few wise words to get us started… “Proceed with no expectations” followed by “Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans”, and “The root of suffering is attachment” and “First chaos, then order. Repeat” which I think you explained so well. The challenge becomes easier when our expectation is first chaos, then order as we make it. Grasping this, I think, is life changing. I remember feeling the same way about M. Scott Peck’s opening words in his book The Road Less Traveled…”Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.” And somehow that seems more manageable.
That is such a beautiful quote. It makes perfet sense to me .. thank you –
There is a lot of wisdom and well written prose in this post. We will hope for the best for Lady.
yes – life is full of … – well, life is just full.
Only you can take the daily work good and hard and turn it into pure poetry. You have such a way with your words. Life is fun but never easy.
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I’ve just finished a lovely catch up, reading nearly 20 of your blogs in a row. It’s like reading a book; which makes me wonder if one day you will select from all these blogs and make a book. It could run to several volumes. Having followed your blog for several years, I am fascinated by the many ways in which the farm has developed, and I admire the way you keep writing and posting. It’s just wonderful.
Dear Miss C.. you will do what is right and what needs to be done.. HUGS! Val